Searching for the Ideal

For those of you who missed it, I posted an article yesterday about the 7-day happiness challenge.   The challenge the last day was to live like your ideal self — dress in the clothes your ideal self would wear, speak like your ideal self you talk, and act like your ideal self would behave.

This started churning in my brain.  How would my ideal self act? look? speak?

1. Unhurried.

In the last few years, my life has become increasingly busy.  I have taken on new responsibilities, I have made new friends and I have joined new groups.  I have also had two not-so-new anymore children.  I often feel like I have no free time, and that I don’t necessarily have enough time to linger and chat for even an extra minute at meetings.

I want to change that.  I know that by not chatting, and acting harried that I am probably giving people the wrong impression — that I’m not interested in them, that I am not appreciative of their participation in the project or that I am more self-absorbed than anything.

So yesterday morning, I went to a meeting.  I didn’t look at my phone.  I paid attention to the other person and I tried to not rush.  I don’t think it took more than five extra minutes, but I felt like I was making progress.

purple boots for my ideal self
(c) Piperlime.com

2. Phones over email.

Email is efficient and task oriented.  A phone call is more personal, but often takes more time.  Adding to my unhurried routine, my ideal self would take the extra time needed to make the personal connection.

3. The Right Thing

We all say we want to do the right thing.  Sometimes though, figuring it out can be tough.  Sometimes there are competing interests, both of which have a good point.  Usually though, your gut tells you the right thing for you.  My ideal self would follow the right thing for me — and not sacrifice unnecessarily for others.

4. No bullies

I think many of us have worked with at least one person over the years that could be called a tyrant.  Someone who orders others around and doesn’t recognize efforts and does their best to belittle and blame others.  My ideal self would tell the bully to treat me in a professional manner.  If that didn’t happen, I wouldn’t work with the bully anymore.  There is not good reason to subject oneself to mistreatment.

5. First things first

My kids and my husband mean more to me than anything.  But sometimes other things shove out the time I have with them.  My ideal self would have quality time every day with them, and wouldn’t spend the time with them in front of a computer or with my nose in a phone trying to catch up.

Is it all going to happen?  No, probably not at once.  But I am hopeful that now that I am really aware of how far off I have become from acting like the person I want to be that I can consciously make some changes for the better.

Oh — and I decided my ideal self wears purple boots, most days of the week.

(c) KJD Legal